ROAD WORK AHEAD

In my rearview i see a rough and curvy rough road, paved with pain and disappointment huge potholes created by the absence of validation and a convoluted self image.The series of unfortunate events i have come to call my life have come together to make the diamond that stands before you. For the pressure of an absent family life, my diagnosis, and broken heart have forged a rough path that will soon be paved with success and prosperity. The place where i stand today is the start line to the rest of my life. In the mix of jabber about cd4 counts viral loads reverse and protease inhibitors it is easy to become overwhelmed and lose your way. I have come to know that i serve a god that never puts more on us than we can bear and I'm doing just fine. Going forward i plan to finish up at wssu then on to med school for pharmacy. I have decided i want to learn more about the drugs that combat the virus. I see marriage off in the distance i dont know who he is just yet but ill know him for sure when i see him, he might be in my circle already*wink*. I want a nice house unbreakable bond and an overall sense of well being and security. i want trust and above all undying unconditional love all the way until the bittersweet end. My hope for my American dream was validated today when i talked briefly to a man who i had a lil crush on but now I look forward to just getting to know him on a friendly level. He talks so happily about his relationship it is evident how fulfilling it is by the glow that radiates from him each i i see him. I use his current place in life as a mile marker on the road to my manifesting destiny. My road to recovery is paved with the restoration of my self confidence and image. after you diagnosed the major thing of a vain persons mind is not looking sick, a pimple suddenly becomes a sign of sickness to no one but yourself. I am adjusting simply by reminding myself that I'm not sick i instead have a well maintained virus. My recovery is further dependent on the healing of my torn and tattered heart. A Major part of my recovery has been this blog, just sharing my story. It takes a lot to bare all to the world so i thank all of you in advance for not judging me or treating me differently. The major dilemma hen deciding to come out is who will want me, allow me to address those men who create that insecurity. We all come with baggage, it comes with the miles. My baggage is stamped with all the locations i have traveled and filled with tickets to where I'm going. I'm not where i wanna be but thank go I'm not where i used to be. I beautiful I'm smart and you know what I'M POSITIVE

Royalty - Byron Cage